THUNDER CLAP

Under ourselves Indivisible

We're run by these Individuals

We can't see In the visuals

Taking all our 99% Residuals.

Luke I am not your Father

Floating suspended underwater

Burns hot together metal sauter

Souls wove makes a son or daughter

I know I don't have it together.

Rain cloud clap bad weather.

Groups of feathers flock forever.

Stuck in my own rut that I gotta sever.

Crumbling from this fragile nation

Why resort to Condemnation

I know I'm blessed but still stressed

Needs some elevation

With this lack of communication

Reasons for my internal Flagellation

Stuck here in this fragile station

Tried to escape vacation cancelation

Found it all in you but you

choose to choose another dude.

Give all of me its rude your attitude

This love from you was pre-chewed.

I know I don't have it together.

Rain cloud thunder clap loud weather.

Groups of feathers flock forever.

Stuck in my own rut that I gotta sever.

So that's all I got.

Not to pick on you or pick your spot.

Living the life I'm given.

Seek out my destination my vision

Cause my cause of addiction

Love conquers life's ambition

End of the road

bottom line stone cold

wherever I roam

To find my own home cause.

I know I don't have it together.

Rain cloud thunder clap loud weather.

Groups of feathers flock forever.

Stuck in my own rut that I gotta sever.

Rain cloud thunder. Clap clap clap.

Pain now mother. Clap clap clap

Rain cloud thunder. Clap clap clap

Rain cloud thunder!

I know I don't have it together.

Rain cloud thunder clap loud weather.

Groups of feathers flock forever.

Stuck in a rut that I gotta sever.

RELATIONSHIP RAMBLES

She can easily find a better guy

Happy sweetness Peace of pie

Taller more handsome than I

She's a knockout right in the eye.

She's got me others got none

We're still just friends having fun

I'm that case I feel color runs

Down her face he left blue bumps.

You see my conundrum

The life not so humdrum

Singing for myself in a band

Futures bright health be a man

Demi attractive sexually

Doesn't matter actually

Could it be to me perfectly

Where in life I want to be?

Don't get too close. But don't be too far.

This balancing emotions is very hard.

Take a trip to the local bar.

Drive to mountains in my car.

Idk if they like me that way.

Taking things slow is ok.

Don't get ahead of myself.

Unless you want to head yourself.

Your mans hand is used against you

I just want to lay against you

Run from the tyranny tears she's shed

Run away from the pain that fears fed

I see you as my future one and only

But I gotta take time to better know me

You are a fantasy figment of my reality

Testing my actions and distractions had to be

I haven't known myself for years

Weekends with some buds not beers.

She's helpped me through jeer and cheers

Through lots of fear and tears.

For my own kind my own peace of mind

Before I can vibe with my tribe and cheer

NEW HOPE

Oooo Ahhh! Oooo Ahhh!

Trip on the past

At one point in time

Dark skies have past

Over this life of mine

Stare and lose focus

Feeling so low

Not all is hopeless

You go with the flow

Credits are rolling cut the ties

Waves are controlling rips inside

Moments unfolding sequence of lines

Your broken hearts have equal minds

We are the new hope!

We are the new hope!

We will not fail

The strength it burns within us

Tell our tale

The problems they don't concern us

Minds in jail

Lacking even common sense

Piercing the veil

With the Chain of Consequence

Credits are rolling cut the ties

Waves are controlling rips inside

Moments unfolding sequence of lines

Your broken hearts have equal minds

We are the new hope!

We are the new hope!

Day after day spent chasing

While my whole lifes been wasting

Resurrection to my woeful

Vocal redemption facing

The new hope where we walk the skies

The new dope the darkest of sides

Savior’s sabre is in your favor

Of course the force replies

Oooo Ahhh! Oooo Ahhh!

Credits are rolling cut the ties

Waves are controlling rips inside

Moments unfolding sequence of lines

Your broken hearts have equal minds

We are the new hope!

We are the new hope!

Credits are rolling cut the ties

Waves are controlling rips inside

Moments unfolding sequence of lines

Your broken hearts have equal minds

We are the new hope!

We are the new hope!

#011_WHITE NIGHT

All lives matter represents

Courage and strength Incredulous

All these years no Evidence

Were taken away from our Elements

I making history

This millennial hippie

Rhyming beats sickly

Then it hit me

Come join with me

Our leaders are crazy

One for all all for none

More money give me

Switch it up break it down light it up

Take a break stay awake Fill my cup

Make a change being strange that's what up leave it there let it be thats enough

You protect what you project onto others

Calling names to brothers and mothers

You beat the hell out of one another

Still insecure under your covers

Sorry you never got loved as a child

Parents gave no kisses and hugs

Turned to violence and harder drugs

Hung out with harder thugs

I want to be your white night

Passion and Fire it burns bright

Through the darkness a blinding light

Have ourselves an afternoon delight

Rush into battle fight the good fight

Save your insight bast off again team rocket take flight

Just met but vibes are tight

Too good to be true is it real life

Is it heaven or a simulation

Or emotions by my lower stimulation.

Is she the better sunshine weather

Not into birds but still flock of feathers

never bitter and never better

Got that degree making chedder

Go with glow let their true colors show

Don't be nervous ebb and flow

The right one your heart will reveal

In time well spent love will heal

I want to be your white night

Passion and Fire it burns bright

Through the darkness a blinding light

Have ourselves an afternoon delight

Rush into battle fight the good fight

Save your insight bast off again team rocket take flight

#010_HALF FAST

I hated who I was.

I didn't see the blessed be above.

My vice was my substitution for love.

Made me feel normal who I was.

Feeling low on the dominance hierarchy.

Like Jordan Peterson psychology.

I have performance social anxiety

Self compassion wasnt a priotory.

Got to be my best self not live in the past don't want to be a part of a caste cast.

Of my journey plays out like a movie.

Did she think she really knew me?

Screw me you had the last laugh

Traveling and unraveling half assed and half fast.

Destroy your BS your big snooze.

Grab myself a bowl and booze.

Sure drink to fade away the blues.

Mind goes on a cruise Peace be with you.

Be silly honest kind and true.

To yourself and everyone around you.

I want to be my self not live in the past don't want to be a part of a caste cast.

Of my journey plays out like a movie.

Did she think she really knew me?

Screw me you had the last laugh

Traveling and unraveling half assed and half fast.

I use my song as away

to say what I don't day to day.

Okay dokay layday it's payday.

I'll take you to a vaycay at Chipotle

get extra guacamole you deserve it.

maye be its maybeline

Trip to Lorel Paris

Because you're worth it.

These words come to me from experience in the past.

And maybe some inspiration form puff puff pass.

They say that nice guys finish last but real nice guys finish last.

Sit down lawnmower cutting the grass

I want to be my self not live in the past don't want to be a part of a caste cast.

Of my journey plays out like a movie.

Did she think she really knew me?

Screw me you had the last laugh

Traveling and unraveling half assed and half fast

#009_LIFE IS

Through the smoke I see the real me

Personally who i am supposed to be.

I want to feel alive!

No woman no cry.

No lady by my side

I've got good friends and good vibes.

I fear being alone.

Oh I fear a lot take me

I don't let it make me

Someone I'm not.

I live for me and only me.

That may sound selfish.

I'm not hurting others

Sitting eating shellfish.

Life is suffering suffering.

Brain is buffering buffering.

Along I keep shuffling shuffling.

Speech mumbling muffleing.

I help my self where I can.

Others help me out too.

If you want nothing to do.

Sell me out Screw you.

Life is suffering suffering.

Brain is buffering buffering.

Along I keep shuffling shuffling.

Speech Discussing mumbling muffleing.

I fake confidence.

I want to burst into tears.

All alone facing my greatest fears.

Don't let the darkness get to me.

False courage. False hope.

Distracting me.

Emotional reactions to my actions.

Decides us into opposing factions.

Life is not suffering suffering.

Brain will stop buffering buffering.

Along I keep shuffling shuffling.

Busy bee keep buzzing bumbling.

#008_NEW WORLD

I am not who I think I am. I am who I think you think I am.

One foot up escalator keep winning

Barbecue for me and you hot wingin

Im on stage but you the one singin

like my dairy cheese please be stringin

Stoned slasher hash slinging

Trash the stash digging

door flash dash ringing

Wear sash crown blinging...

Wearing them up

Throw your shade I'll block the sun.

You think you control my game

I'm the one who won

from the undone of societies top one

The percent of

The president of

sets presidence of

Our pestulent love.

I'm not who I think I am. I am who I think you think I am.

Odd I even give a damn.

Put my mask on Instagram.

I can't tell who I really am.

Perfected misdirect kablam.

I am who I think you think I am.

I'm not who I thought I was.

Were all flawed humans.

We wish to spread out our wings

We already float on tightrope things.

Mast puppeteer cut me loose

Give me a life where I can choose

Take that shame take that blame

Cut me loose to win the game

Highly awake

In natures space.

Can't look at you

They hate your face.

In the new world

Be me and you girl.

Float on the wind

Well give it a whirl.

I'm not who I think I am. I am who I think you think I am.

#007_THE FOREST

Can't see the Forest, through the trees.

Blinded eye lids succeed the disease.

Upon the Earth upon the skies!

Down in a hole broke choked died...

Peek in between fingers They seek and you hide

...

Over the moon for a good vibration

Don't give up the fight in your head

Know our seeds grow happy trees

Anything else go to bed

...

Our healing here is only temporary.

Why not make the hero ordinary.

All of that smoke has disappeared

All the memories switching gears

All of it is a mindset

reframing the fears

...

Over the moon for a good vibration

Don't give up the fight in your head

Know our seeds grow happy trees

Anything else go to bed

...

Replace the time, escape your self

Erase yourself draw the line

Replace the time escape your self

Copy and paste, in case of health

Lock box stop, encase your wealth

...

I'm going under so insecure

Under the sea to the see floor

Bust my myth with some c4

........

Addicted to that dopamine chemical

I need me a medical professional

This decisions not flexible inevitable

........

Permission to feel physical anxiety

Cant control what goes in and outta me

All I see is red lazy river i will be

........

Taking away your power of gladness

Due to my own excess of sadness

Manifests into external maddness

...

Over the moon for a good vibration

Don't give up the fight in your head

Know our seeds grow happy trees

Anything else go to bed

#006_SPACE WHALE

Sometimes I feel like I'm everyone's daddy
Feel like a golfer with out their own caddy
Its not my job to make all of them happy
But man I am so super I will do that gladly

Hate it so much to see other suffer
Do not like glue so use a rubber
Be a rowboat with no rudder
I'm a space whale love's my blubber

To those with none or one on father's day
If they are close or if they are far away
A parent to you you gotta be
Take your time the martyrs way

Take me away to those promise lands
Create a future with my hands
We are all just getting by setting our own scene
We're all just making pretty pictures to be seen

It hurts like a curse but feels way worse
Want to be an ostrich head in the dirt
It's no marathon won't come in first
Don't be scared so quench your thirst

I don't feel like Jesus I feel like a Judas
Needed my help the truth Is ruthless
Can't save them all feeling so useless
Enter the dragon but my bite is toothless

O places we'll go walk swim or drive
To be the perfect dad I will now strive
For those around those who alone cry
Be thankful you're here and that you're alive

Take me away to those promise lands
Create a proud future with my hands
We are all just getting by setting our own scene
We're all just making pretty pictures to be seen…

#005_FUSCHIA

…Don't think I knew that Thought it was true but Closing of the door Before I even knew it
Im Painting my future the color of FUCHSIA If I don't see tomorrow I have seen right through it Farmer in the mortadella Dead computer morte della Farther stretches mozzarella
She's my dairy Cinderella I'm doing so well oh well lie I can never tella Twilight like pavlov Ringing of that bella….

... I don't need much You're all I really need Rolling that dutch Blame it all on the weed
Brady the bunch Cards drawn pot of greed Call it a hunch Ride on a noble steed
Hi ho silver awayyy But I can not sayyy
Hi ho silver awayyy And you can not stayyy ...

…Feeling or thinking Pull my reigns I'm sinking Clean up your mess I fear it is stinking
I'm cleaning my closet What my minds been caught in Clears fears Thoughts Locked up
bought in It's time to step up Coffees in my cup Taking a sip by the drip for that good luck
Let's make those big bucks Touring with big trucks Cruising around town lock down what's up?…

... As I despise to comprise
With all that wants to stay inside
The clock is set this is my time
To be myself start to unwind
Out of the dark to be the light
For all of those who run and hide
Inside my soul I stroll to find
I am the sun that rose to shine…
…Chose only ways I know to help
My other brother on that shelf
I am not rich but I got wealth
Divides the insides feels like hell
Decide the divine is in myself
So here it is what I have felt
Before they can all be saved
I'll have to save myself…

…So you have the audacity
To poke fun at this tragedy
Said you did what had to be
Done you won turn your back to me
What was done the sad in me
Drought in my ducts dried up in me
Bringing some peace to the calamity
This Ideocentricity…
…This my true self authenticity
Swirls my world psychologically
No longer anonymously
Im starting to say what I see
Death always will come for me
For all a possibility
I am breaking free
Of all my Anxiety...

…I don't need much You're all I really need Rolling that dutch Blame it on the weed
Brady the bunch Cards drawn pot of greed Call it hunch Ride on noble steed
Hi ho silver awayyy But I can not sayyy
Hi ho silver awayyy And you can not stayyy…

#004_INNER DEMONS

Inner demons wrestling

Elbow drop stop obsessing

Too much clutter it's upsetting

Gotta count all of my blessings

Head in a vise body under arrest

Pulling heart strings outta my chest

You gotta problem with how I feel

Say it straight up make it real

I know I've wasted the years

Tried and tied down my fears

Holding back all the tears

Escaped that place and im still here

All of this goes on for days

Frozen stuck in my old ways

I need me to break through

I need me to speak to all of you

...

Lifes a game then I'm not playing...

All aboard I'm bored of praying...

Knifes a shame stuck in the sand...

But responsibly will make this man

...

Marching halls through corridors

We are one for all for sure

Just gotta open more doors

Walking simply through Mordor

Those unknown faces judging

Scowls frowns no budging

All sour not sweet loving

Get the hint poke poke nudging

Others opinions worth nothing

Gotta save time I'm adjusting

Don't care enough light dusting

Confidence sense be busting

Evolution ended reborn

Wounds upended retorn

Step by step forewarn

Old me passed we mourn

...

Lifes a game? I'm not playing

All aboard the board before playing

Loving it up when I can

But responsibly still makes the man

...

#003_THE EDGE

At the edge of madness
Due to excessive sadness
Fading out my gladness
Cake of lies like glados

Clark Kent smallville superpowers
Princess upon spiraled towers
Surrounded by fields of flowers
Takes about ten thousand hours

Reflection of who I used to be
Reflection staring back at me
Hold off on my tendencies
Sold out all dispensaries

Mountains high as i can see
The climb is harder naturally
Honestly where's my energy
Be the best that I can I be

Find all life's answers right now

Reflect back at your home town

Green trees with brown cows

Lifts you up when you fell down

SCRAP PART ROBOT

As these words were written on scrap paper, this sculpture from college was put together with scrap metal. I was accepted into their annual art show. Someone was going to buy it for $150 on the day of finals but he no showed. I got upset it was never bought but jokes on him he missed the final. But also jokes on me because I got upset at the situation, kept the sculpture in my trunk for ages. Its soon fell apart into the scrap pieces they once were never to be put back together again.

SCRAPS

Here we have some poetry or song ideas. It doesn’t matter what they end up as. Writing poetry, raps, songs, it is a way of saying the words I can not say out loud. In other words the things that are difficult to get off my chest.

The name scraps come from the fact that most of these are jotted on scrap paper. Plus with a little self-deprecation I though they weren’t that good or crappy. This is a skill I do not tell most people because of the negative societal stigma but this is where my ideas can be stored and shared regardless of opinions don’t matter. It makes me happy and relieved to get these words and feelings out. I hope you enjoy them.

#002_COMING HOME

drink wine, bake bread

smoke little clear head

stress anxiety depression

will kill you dead

celebrate it all

the big and small

celebrate your friends and family

have a ball

confident not cocky

sharp like mottzarelli

no juke box

still like fonzarelli

love who you are love who you is

love whats around you and the ones your with

time ticks by

well see each other soon

ill be sitting here in my room

work and work

hours pass me by

want to see the love in your eyes

i’m coming home

after a long tired day

i’ve got so much to say

home baby

to your arms my dear

time to relax were finally here

#001_NERVES

maui wowie tokin

omnipotent

alls awoken

body floating

hand holding

man molding

mind blowing

words flowing

i want to do what a man do

only one to understand you

i only can do what i can do

lets be old holding hands too

get it together this is no fantasy

do what you have to get some clarity

im not the biggest man you see

need to be smacked by reality

another day living still in

whats going to be thrown at me

Am i gonna be ready

or will i ever be?

noone knows the future

change yourself today

fit the ideal game of life

where you choose to play